Sunday, November 28, 2010

Never Say Never......

I had a close call this month. And the more I reflect on how this situation could possibly happen to me, the more I realize that this recession is simply kicking a lot of us in the butt.

As it turns out I find myself staring homelessness in the face never knowing if I'll have a place to stay from week to week. So far, I've managed to survive 6 weeks since my roommate took the rent money and left me with overdue utilities and a 5 day or quit notice. It has been intense to say the least. However, I've managed to get two part time jobs and a roommate to help me try to stay afloat. We'll have to see.

But in the meantime, I keep my eyes open for affordable housing just in case. And of course I have my favorite property management company Scottsdale Fine Properties conveniently bookmarked on my computer. I can peruse their website in search of luxury homes as well as nicer apartments and more. They can work quickly and I know will help me transition into a new to me home, should I need their services. It's a little comforting knowing they'll take are of me.

But for now, I take things one week at a time until my situation turns around financially. I am quickly learning the art of negotiation and barter. And it is fast becoming more and more pleasant. Perhaps the “thrill of the hunt?” Who knows? Aside from the finances, we're fed, warm, healthy, safe, dry and most of all loved. We will survive even if we do end up losing our home. Yet it still hurts knowing that I'm so close to losing something that I put so much money and effort into.

However amidst all the craziness, I keep certain values and principals in place, trying to make a warm and safe home for my children while still trying to help others who may be in the same boat as I am, even if it is only for this week. I still am decorating for Christmas and doing all the things people do in their homes. But this never knowing if I'll be able to come up with rent haunts me much in the same way a dull ache in the knee never quite lets you forget that it's there.

I find my faith shaken as I bundle up due to not having heat in my home. I try not to be angry nor bitter at my ex roommate while we bathe in cold water and hand wash our clothing in the bathtub. And I've missed a week of work due to car problems that prevent me from getting there. The same job I've had for only a week. The car problems are easy fixes and I will spend the next few days on threads and forums looking for ways to possibly repair it myself and hopefully save my job.

Yes, my faith is shaken indeed.

Please pray.

God Bless....sigh

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